Say, Girl...That's Not Your Name

If you spent any time in the south (especially during the summer time), you have probably heard the following words at least once in your life:
                                                                                          Say, girl......
I'm not even exactly sure how to punctuate that because the phrase never really made sense, but we all knew what it meant to have a boy yell , "Say, girl....." down the sidewalk at you.  In response to the call, as adolescent girls, without thinking we giggled and turned around because someone was "trying to talk to us" (you have to love the terminology of my beloved south, right?)

Here is the  part that 20 something years later, burns me up....

"GIRL" IS NOT MY NAME....and it isn't yours either.

Wes Moore, author of The Other Wes Moore: One Name Two Fates (Random House, 2011) offers one of my favorite quotes to date when he said,  "We are not a product of our environment, but of our expectations."

YES, Wes!!!!!!  Say it again!!!!!

While this may not be the popular point of view, I find it to be 100% true.  Here's why:

• Tell a child, they have the ability to do something, and they will rise to do it.
• Tell a child they can't do something, and they will believe you, and not even try.

Consider these two questions:

• How many times have we waived the story of a negative statistic in the faces of certain children only to find four years later, they have owned the story as their own and met that low standard?
• How few times have me taken a negative statistic to a child and said,  "THIS IS NOT YOUR STORY" and in turn, witnessed the child who SHOULD have been a negative statistic, rise well above the expectations of society?

As an educator, I live in the second scenario with children. I believe that I was created to promote high expectations for those who may not believe they can reach them.  But guess what....IT STARTS WITH THE ADULTS WHO LEAD THEM.  If they don't believe, then neither will the children they teach.

This post could stop right there... but then, you would possibly miss the fact that I'm not just talking about students in classrooms.  I'm talking to about YOU (Yep,YOU!)....The one who turns around and gets her feelings hurt every time someone doesn't see you in the way you are working hard to present yourself.

Cynae's words of the day are especially for you, friend: 

• Stop turning around every time someone talks to you in a way that reflects the way you used to be or used to view yourself.  THAT'S NOT YOUR NAME!
•  Stop allowing people to speak to you in a way that minimizes your outlook for your future.  THAT'S NOT YOUR NAME! 
• Don't be afraid to correct people when they take the liberty of "calling you" by THEIR expectation and not yours. THAT'S NOT YOUR NAME!

It doesn't matter what things look like around you, behind you, or in front of you.  Here's what DOES MATTER:
                 YOUR EXPECTATIONS FOR YOURSELF!
Whatever YOU expect to achieve is what YOU will achieve (if YOU truly believe you can do it).

So I will go first:

My name is Cynae (pronounced: Su-NAY).  I am an inspirational leader.  I am a writer. I am a successful business woman who will always use the platform I am given to change expectations, minds, hearts, and communities for the better.

What's YOUR name?  

Say it...and make EVERYONE say it with you. 

~Cynae
P.S. If you need to affirm your expectation of yourself with someone, don't hesitate to e-mail me or leave a comment.  Sometimes we just need to say it out loud to someone other than ourselves to believe it.